Essay Final

    In the BDSM lifestyle, submission is considered a valuable gift that can be given to the person one most wishes to please above all others. It is a way of communicating that they are the most trusted and admired person in the one’s life. Giving the gift of submission is not a decision to be taken lightly, as becoming a submissive will change one's way of living drastically. Decisions are no longer to be made by the submissive unless the Master allows. The submissive is to seek only to please their Master, and must trust that their Master will fulfill her own desires and needs as well. This is not a change that will occur overnight. The submissive must learn what pleases her Master, and train herself to do these things instead of what she would normally do for herself. To be considered a good submissive, she must attempt to please her Master by following the rules that have been laid down for her, as well as obeying orders when they are given. After all of this is considered, there are several qualities which are inherent in the nature of a successful submissive, while other qualities must be cultivated. The good submissive must trust in, be obedient to, and have an overwhelming desire to please her Master by any means necessary.
    A submissive must trust her Master. She must know that her Master loves her and will do everything in his power to make sure that her needs and desires are met, that she is not overused, and that she will not be endangered in any way. She must know that her Master will never lose interest or burn out from the effort of training her. This trust must be well-placed, otherwise a submissive could easily end up burning herself out trying to please someone who does not care for her needs. By placing this trust in her Master, the submissive will be able to disregard her own self-preservation instincts, and enjoy serving her Master without worry over her own safety, reputation, or desires. A trusting submissive will be more likely to entrust herself to her Master's care in any situation, no matter how frightening, whether it be punishment or overcoming personal fears and obstacles.
    A good submissive is obedient to her Master without question, regardless of how ridiculous the command, how little she desires to obey, or even if she believes she knows a better way to do what is desired of her. This applies to every command, and to disobey or question a command is the ultimate in disrespect. When the submissive obeys her Master and she doesn't feel like it, he notices. This shows that she has respect for him. If a submissive wishes to question her Master regarding a command, she should do so after obeying. Obedience is how a submissive says "I love and respect you" to her Master, and should never be taken lightly.
    A good submissive puts her desire to please her Master above all else. Without this passion, the submissive will follow rules and commands, but go no further. This will cause the relationship between submissive and Master to become stagnant, and neither party will be taken care of. When a submissive has a strong desire to please, she opens herself up to explore new opportunities with her Master, as well as learn more about herself and her Master. She accepts criticism and teaching respectfully, studying herself to try and make herself more desirable for her Master, which in turn will lead her Master to praise her, strengthening her passion to please. This will create a cycle that will meet the needs and desires of Master and submissive.
    These qualities are the core values that help a person become a good submissive. If these do not exist, then the relationship between Master and submissive can not succeed.  If these qualities are apparent, they will tend to encourage other admirable qualities in the submissive. The Dominant/submissive lifestyle is a symbiotic relationship in which the Master and submissive both meet the opposite and complementing needs of the other. This is why the qualities needed to be a good submissive in many cases rely on the quality and good intentions of the Master as well. She must trust that her Master will treat her fairly, obey without question the commands of her Master, and wish to please Him. If He does not act fairly in response to one of these things, then the whole relationship could fail. This is why D/s is considered more of an open relationship than a traditional relationship, as more depends upon trust. It is very important that a submissive understand what she is giving her Master before she commits to submission.