speech. in progress of edit

When I heard about this title competition, I didn't want to run. I didn't even think about running for a title. It's not my personality, really. In fact, to be totally honest with you guys, I still don't really want to be competing. I would be having a lot more fun if I was sitting in the crowd with everyone else, cheering on my husband and the other contestants. That's where I thought I would be until a week ago. And then it happened. I realized (in the shower of all places - don't you hate it when you're in the shower and think of something you want to write down?) that I have something important to say, and no one else can say it for me. I'm a 22 year old female submissive, with a little over a year of experience in this particular community. I've always been submissive. In fact, if you ever get to see my picture in my high school yearbook, you can see that I'm actually wearing a collar. At that point in time I didn't even know about collaring. I wanted everyone to know that I was owned, (because being owned was what I wanted from a relationship) and I couldn't think of a better way to show it.
There are a lot of young women like me entering the lifestyle, and they need something from us. They need us to reach out to them and give them a place in the community. (A lot of groups actually don't allow women to attend until they are 21, for various reasons. But these young women need guidance and support even more than you might think, because they've just become adults and they're learning everything, not just the how to find their place in the community, but how to find their place in the rest of society as well. They need this, and they're going to get it somewhere, even if it's not from us.)
My point is that we as a community need to keep an eye out for these young girls, maybe even before they join fetlife. (you know the wrong sort are already keeping an eye out for them). We need to let them know that there is a large group of people out there who think like they do - they're not freaks, and they're not alone. They need to know that the one dominant-type person they've found isn't their only option, and they need someone to tell them, "It's OK that you wanna to do this, but this is how you do it safely."
I say all this, because

some pretty bad shit happened to me before I found the community, and maybe if someone had noticed , taken me aside, and talked honestly to me about it, that shit would never have happened. It's our responsibility to step up, step out and help protect the people who become victims the most often, even if they don't know they need it. Thank you for your time. 


I wish that someone had noticed me, when I was that age, and told me that I wasn't bad for what I thought then. I wish that someone had said, you know, I've been watching you, and I just want to let you know that there are safer ways to go out and find what you're looking for. There are other people who can help you take care of your needs, and there are ways to make sure that it's safe to do.


Now, people in general aren't really very smart. No offense you guys. But young people can be downright stupid sometimes. Especially young women. Girls can do some stupid, stupid stuff when they think they found someone who will love and accept them. Or even just when they want to go to a party, ... Jessi. I know several girls who never even had second thought about meeting new people alone. They hopped in the car with a stranger to ride an hour away, and didn't even know the name of the town they were going to, much less ask someone to call and check in on them every hour, two hours, or even once the whole time they were there!

These people who are new to the lifestyle need someone to guide and mentor them, even if it's just to say "hey, you know to have someone call you to check in and make sure everything is alright every couple hours when you're alone with someone new, right?" or "Hey... let me go with you to meet this new person, I've never heard of them before." "have you checked this person's references? I've never heard of them, and I know most of the people in this area. Maybe you shouldn't go meet them alone."

In my perfect vision of the community, every new person to the community would have a mentor within a week. You want unity? Start by having the experienced people reach out to the newbies.

Start mentoring someone who needs it. You might save their life.

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