coming down

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yq6kgy-chlk

Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one having any fun, because I'm the masochist, I'm the one who wants to get beat.. that other people are just doing what I want. It hurts me as a submissive when I feel like this, because I absolutely can't stand when something is being done solely for me to enjoy and the other person isn't having any fun at all. It makes me feel like I have too much control. It's like that time when a guy told me that I owed him, because he'd been "taking care of my needs" and I never did anything to take care of his. That hurt, I thought he enjoyed what we did, especially since I didn't even like a lot of it. he tried to make me feel like I owed him for what we did together. I never want to feel that way again. Ever. That was the first person I ever gave a blow-job to, and I definitely regret that. Anyway... sometimes, something comes along and blows my whole "everyone is taking care of me and giving me the beatings and stuff I want" worry out of the water. I have days when I'm sadistic, that's for sure, but I always feel like it's so much more work to be sadistic than masochistic. Sure I take the beating, but it's a lot of work to beat someone too, and I worry it isn't worth the effort for the sadist.


the party. sigh.

I'm so fucking sore. It's going to take a while to explain anything and everything so I need a second to collect my thoughts I suppose.

I have to write about:

The interrogation/humiliation/waterboarding scene with major. 

The blowjob I gave Daddy

The anal sex last night in the dungeon with the windows uncovered. The conversation that led up to it. 

Sucking Him off in the bathroom, getting slapped and so on.

A punishment idea I had

How much Master looked like Tim Curry at the party
Cleaning the basement
An idea we had for a scene that I shred with Major
"Come, Slut."
"Here slut, have a cookie" 
Definition of slut/whore for Him
my fucking camera!!!!!!
My vagina tastes like salt and vinegar chips! (Phiar, of course.)
The song!!!! Again - Flyleaf




I'm using this weird color to indicate when Phiar came out
Sydney
Emily
Danny
Susy    
Phiar

Yeah, true story. Named have been added to advertise the awesome.

Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one having any fun, because I'm the masochist, I'm the one who wants to get beat.. and other people are just doing what I want. It hurts me as a submissive when I feel like this, because I absolutely can't stand when something is being done solely for me to enjoy and the other person isn't having any fun at all. It makes me feel like I have too much control. I have days when I'm sadistic, that's for sure, but I always feel like it's so much more work to be sadistic than masochistic. Sure, I take the beating, but it's a lot of work to beat someone, too and I worry it isn't worth the effort for the sadist. Sometimes, something comes along and blows my whole "everyone is taking care of me and giving me the beatings and stuff I want" worry out of the water. [SargentMajor][http://fetlife.com/users/81212] drowned out (pun) any worry I had about being the only one having any fun, that's for sure. Thanks again for that reminder, sometimes that sadistic grin just hits the spot.

------------------------------------------

Halfway through the party, [Master][http://fetlife.com/users/529131] informed me that I wasn't allowed to go to the bathroom. He said it was a part of the scene I was going to be doing with [SargentMajor.][http://fetlife.com/users/81212] Needless to say I was immediately pissed off (pun) and very surprised. "So you're telling me that SargentMajor wants me to piss myself? During a scene? I don't know half the people at this party, and I don't trust the other half!" I also hadn't used the bathroom for at least 4 hours previous to being told this. "I'm a slave, I go to the bathroom when I have a chance to, not when I need to." It was shortly after this that we snuck away from the party into the bathroom (Damn it, so close, why can't I go?) to do negotiations for the scene that was already planned out. Luckily no one ran the sink while we did negotiations. Master told me I wasn't allowed to go, so I didn't (It makes me have to pee just thinking about it).

Negotiations went something like this:

SargentMajor: "I've got a lot planned, do you have any questions?"

me: "why the fuck do you want me to piss myself?"

SargentMajor: "I didn't say that... you *might* be able to hold it." Cue Big Grin.

me: so... I don't know anything about what's going to happen, so how am I going to negotiate? I don't even know what equipment to expect. I mean is it suspension, partial suspension, wax play, bondage, impact....?"

SargentMajor: "Oh, well you're going to get wet, and (I edited this to make it funnier) we might have to hang you up to dry."

me: "And you're going to try to make me piss myself?"

SargentMajor: "... yeah."

me: "um..."

SargentMajor: "I'm going to give you something you asked for a while back."

me: "Really? I don't remember asking to piss myself in front of people I don't know"

SargentMajor: (again, edited) "Well that part's for me. (end edit) But you did say that you wanted to do an interrogation scene. It's going to be like that, only humiliation, too."

me: "Oh. That sounds fun (This time I didn't say how much I needed to piss). But um..."

SargentMajor: "Yeah?"

me: "Didn't you say you start most of your interrogations with waterboarding because you want to get your confession immediately? I'm not sure about that, (don't remember even nearly what I said here) and I'm not sure I want the scene to end that quickly.  (I also expressed concern that I'd been gearing up for impact play and now there wasn't really going to be any impact play[I assumed that if I'm getting wet, I'm not going to be hit with toys, as that could mess them up].) "

SargentMajor: "Oh I probably won't waterboard you, don't worry about that. Oh, but you are going to have to hold your breathe for some of it."

me: "ok. but damn it I have to pee."

SargentMajor: "Well, you **might** be able to hold it. I mean, I don't think you will, but it could happen."

And that was pretty much the extent of the negotiating (worth hearing about anyway).  (I do not advocate short negotiations for others, Master did most of my negotiating for me (Obviously He knows my limits and such), and I've known SargentMajor for long enough that he knows my hard limits, likes, dislikes, turn-ons/offs, and can judge how much I can handle during a scene.)

The party went on, SargentMajor took pictures of people dressed up for the party, and I went and put on more make-up (What? Sadists like smearing a girl's make-up when they're trying to break her, don't they? Yes, I was being a cock-tease to my sadist, it's a little thing I like to call "Turnabout = fair play") and stared really hard at the toilet. Pretty sure somewhere in here I gave Master one of those "You evil Bastard" looks, and He just laughed at me, and reassured me that I'd have a lot of fun. I was half-naked and chilled for most of the party (which always turns off my masochist, I can't stand being cold.) so it was really hard to wrap my mind around the scene. Once I started getting into the right frame of mind (I actually despise the word "headspace") I had loads of thoughts and questions and things I needed to tell Master and SargentMajor.

"I am actually going to **play,** You know that right? I mean I'm really going to get into this, I'm going to be *in* the scene, and I don't think SargentMajor has had me that into it before... Do You think he can handle that?" (I love the thought of an interrogation, but there's an element of roleplay that can be used or not, and so part of me wanted to dive in and just be in some basement in the middle of nowhere being tortured for information.)

Emily, Phiar and Danny might show up to play. You might need to talk to Danny before we get started. 

"Hey Major, Don't take my socks off."

"I'm not going to be cold, am I?"

"Baby... I really have to piss."
"Not without permission, you won't."  
"Yes, Sir."

Everyone kept saying they couldn't wait to see our scene, and I was totally in the dark and clueless, because I didn't know what was going to happen, but apparently everyone else already did. Which made me nervous. I actually really don't like being in front of people. I've cried before every oral (hehe oral) report I had to give in high school, and I kind of panic when I have to call people, even if I know them. This is the reply I got, (SargentMajor) which actually put things in perspective a little for me about it (Phobias aren't rational, people. I know mine aren't, but I still have them).

"How are you into humiliation if you're afraid of people? It's kind of hard to be humiliated by yourself, isn't it?"

So then I waited like an hour. I ate some food, and started to get into my mind.

Finally, SargentMajor came upstairs and said he was almost ready, he just had to get a few more things and smoke first. It felt like the interrogation had already started because of the waiting. I was so antsy.

OK, let's do this! We walk toward the dungeon, and as we get to the stairs, SargentMajor said, "After you."

I walk down in front of him, and think about my wedding band. I don't want it to get lost or messed up, especially after I've seen all the chairs and people in them downstairs waiting to see me **get it.** I pause, and He keeps walking. I don't think he touched me, but his voice was stern when he said "keep going!" and it felt like he pushed me forward with his voice. It startled me and I moved forward, because I hadn't been expecting it. Then I realized what I'd done. I stopped again toward the bottom, and I think he shoved me that time, and called me a whore. I'd stopped to try to get him to bump into me, get him off balance, but he had stayed farther back on purpose. I knew I didn't have much time (if any), but I knew I had to get my ring to Master. I walked fast and purposely to the end of the dungeon where He was (Ignoring the huge crowd of people who were watching), and took it off on the way there. I think SargentMajor said something along the lines of, "Where do you think you're going, slut?" but I was focused on my Master. He grabbed my arm, and I held the ring out, "Please hold this for me, Sir!" as I was jerked backward by my other arm. Master took my ring just in time, and then I was being led back to the chair.

I closed my eyes as soon as I dropped contact with Master, I was afraid to look at all those people. Major said that sluts didn't need to see, and to stop looking around. He had a different voice for this scene than I've heard before, but it wasn't a surprise either, it just seemed so natural from him, like when Master goes into  drill mode for my positions. He blindfolded me, saying, "sluts like you don't need to see what they're doing" and then cuffed my wrists behind my back. The chair made a squeal as it slid across the floor. "Sit the fuck down." I sat on my cuffed hands. "Why the fuck don't you have your legs spread? Whores never keep their legs together, spread those legs, let everyone see what a slut you are." He reached down and shoved my legs spread. I hooked my feet around the chair legs, so that I wouldn't forget and close them. I wasn't resisting at all. The plan (on my end) was to play along for a bit and then try and turn it on him. I ended up abandoning this plan, just like he went a different direction from his plan as well, but it was still a good plan. I was going to scream and yell like i was in pain once it got close to what normally hurts, and then start laughing at him and be like "you think that fucking hurt? what kind of a sadist do you think you are?" and then switch to Emily, watch the fun and hold her out. The earmuffs went on and the name-calling continued and dropped off as he walked away. I waited about five seconds to add effect, and shook the earmuffs off.

"Fucking whore!"  The earmuffs went back on, and he slapped the insides of my thighs. It felt really good. I kept quiet so that it didn't seem like I was enjoying it too much. "Now fucking leave those on."

Silence. 

The blindfold covered my whole face. I grinned, no one could see my smile. The thin, black, non-absorbent fabric stuck to my lips and I couldn't unstick it just by moving my head. For a few seconds I regretted the lipstick. I blew the blindfold loose, and hated the fabric choice. It moved to easy with my breathing, and I had to breathe shallower because it kept sucking to my face. "It's supposed to put you on edge, don't let it." I told myself, leveled my breaths, and relaxed. These cuffs are really loose, I wonder if he's nearby? I think I can slip at least one hand out, while I'm sitting on it.

*Avalanche is sullen and too thin

she starves herself to rid herself of sin

and the kick is so divine when she sees bones beneath her skin...

Hey baby can you bleed like me, oh come on baby can you bleed like me*

I love this song!  Should I tell them to change it? I'm not sure Jessi can handle this song- but I really want to hear this next part. Is this supposed to make me pee?

I leaned my left leg toward the center, not on purpose, but just getting more comfy. WHOA THAT'S HOT! Mmm, that's hot. I leaned my leg close to it slowly until it was touching the hot surface, but barely. I pulled on the cuffs and dug them into my wrists, enjoying the pain. Yeah I moaned. I was loving it! I couldn't hold my leg to the heat for more than about four seconds at a time, but it felt amazing.

"Don't fucking close your legs, you'll get a nasty surprise if you do."

I kind of grinned pretty big to myself at this point, because I'd already been enjoying his "nasty little surprise" and he didn't know.

Someone in middle front row said "Look at that, she's getting off on it." Good, so the new folks can see I'm having a good time. That means I don't have to worry about anything. I told Master I was going to really get into the scene and enjoy myself, and now my burdens about doing that were lifted.

SargentMajor came back, "FUCKING PATHETIC WHORE!" and pulled my boots off (I kept my legs spread but flush with the chair legs so that it took him a while to get my right boot off).

Quiet again. I put my left leg up in the chair, to be ready to move over top of whatever was hot in between my legs.I couldn't tell what it was, but I only felt a small tall thin section of it, and it felt like a curling iron standing upward. "Oh you think that's fucking clever, do you? We'll have to fix that." He tied my ankles - I think it was a chain. When he did that I pushed my legs away from the chair legs, obviously. I actually was focusing pretty intently on making his job difficult while seeming to cooperate. He kept talking while he "punished' (glad I had the blindfold, because I had a huge fucking grin on my face and actually leaned into a few of the hits) me for moving my leg up. He pulled up my sports bra and then hit me several times, but not a hard as he normally would, I think because I hadn't warmed up at all.

Silence.

I felt the bottom of the chair legs with my feet, to see if I lifted the chair if there were those little feet on the bottom to keep it from sliding (if there were, they'd catch on the chain) or if I'd be able to lift the chair and just slide my feet out. I kept my head cocked to one side to listen for any sign of him moving back. I didn't hear any so I pulled my hand loose, showed off the cuffs to the crowd, and put my hands back together behind the chair.

*JT gets all fucked up in some karaoke bar..* Motherfucker, he made me miss my favorite part of that song.

He tied my hands this time, behind the chair instead of behind me in the chair, with the one cuff still dangling on my wrist, the ropes around and through them, and around my ankles as well (I think).

The headphones were slipping anyway, so I went ahead and shook them off to buy time to pull the ropes through. They were tied easy-mode (he can tie me impossible when he feels like it, but I think the plan was to let me get almost done and then stop it from happening so I would waste time and energy getting my hopes up to get loose) and I just needed some time to get loose from the ropes. I had no clue what I was going to do when I got to the cuffs and chain again. The ropes were pulled loose and then the cuffs went on **tight.**

This time the hits to my breasts were deep (he used his hand) and I couldn't actually decide whether it was a good pain or not (I typically hate impact on my breasts, but hey, it's attention to my tits, so I'm not going to complain. Playing with the tits is always nice) but I don't remember if it hurt, just that it was a deep thud feeling. I don't remember a lot of pain (and by pain I mean pain that **didn't** make me wet) while I was in the chair.

And this is where some things start to get fuzzy.

While still in the chair, before the takedown:

 I pushed the chair back, pinning him against the wall (just for a minute or so) while he was trying to tie me or something, and the knots ended up in front of me instead of where I could reach them this time. Then I stood up, and tried to get away, I think that's what made him suffocate me. I was forced to hold my breath twice, SargentMajor's hand over my nose and mouth to keep me from breathing. He said sluts don't need to breathe. I tried to hold still and not struggle at all when he did that, which was meant to make him play harder. I think it worked.

SargentMajor told me to open my mouth. I did, obediently, prim and proper. Then he tried to make me stick out my tongue, and I would stick it out just enough to get him to make a grab for it to put something on it, and then pull my tongue back into my mouth. After luring his fingers back into my mouth, I bit down. He got a hold on my tongue and I felt something tight and metal, and pulled my tongue back hard again, something else sharp was digging into my tongue so I bit down to hold onto his hand so he wouldn't get my tongue, not necessarily to cause pain. The next time, I bit down. Hard. He did something that made me open my mouth, and when stopped biting, several fingers went down my throat and hit my gag reflex. I choked and then stuck my tongue out "Like a good little slut". Something went on it, it hurt, so I pulled my tongue back into my mouth. Whatever it was, it popped off, and dropped to the floor.  "Wow, you really are a whore, even your tongue is loose."

I think this was when he poured a cup of water over my face. I managed to actually drink part of it, and catch the water in my mouth to keep it from going up my nose. 

Then I was made to stand up. I remember thinking I wouldn't be able to, because ankle cuffs had been put on me, and  attached to the chair I believe. I definitely didn't want to stand up, and when I did I was surprised I could move. I think the cuffs came loose some. I still had a cuff on my right ankle, and at one point I tried to sling it around and use it to hit him in the shin when he was dragging me toward the faucet on the wall.

I was afraid that he would take off the blindfold. It was one of the things I dreaded the most. I really thought seeing a lot of people was going to kill my ability to take pain.  I don't remember when it came off, but I remember seeing the bucket and thinking, well that's just not going to fucking happen. 

He took me down hard, and it was loads of fun. I remember the feeling of falling, and it was so neat that I didn't even feel it when I hit the floor. I don't really remember how it happened, or how long it took to take me down, though. I've been told I giggled, and I remember enjoying all the pain except when I was hit hard on the inner thighs with something that felt wooden, and of course, the drowning, but I really don't consider that to be pain, I kind of consider that something else. 

I remember trying to grab him and my fingernails felt like they went through water. I don't think I was able to see at this point. I thought I'd clawed his wrist (turns out it was his upper left arm, and it's a hell of a pretty mark)

At one point he was standing over me and I could feel him behind me (my hands were still cuffed this whole time!) and I reached as far up as I could go between his legs and grabbed on as tightly as I could. He laughed at me at this point because he was wearing leather pants, they'd gotten wet, and were slippery(so I couldn't get a decent grip), as well as I didn't actually get a handful of anything (I found out later that I got a nut, but didn't squeeze hard enough. SargentMajor said it actually felt good... I'll remember that next time and squeeze a lot harder)

This was when everything got kicked up a notch. I was down and drowned and thoroughly wet (and I'd forgotten that I had to pee and that I was cold) and called a slut and whore. The wet cloth over my face made it hard to breathe just when it was wet, and when water was being poured over it it moved away and let water into my mouth and up my nose. I couldn't just blow out and keep the water out of me like I'd hoped to be able to do. The first bucket made my eyes burn and my nose sting and I was thoroughly drenched and (I love this word!) bedraggled when I was dragged in front of the crowd of people sitting there watching. At one point he paused to check on me, (I'd been trying to loosen one of the cuffs because it was too tight, and I think he could tell something was distracting me) I think this was right after he'd been sitting on my back, my face in a puddle and my arm bent back at a funny angle due to the cuffs.

This is one of the few parts I remember being able to see. I was dragged in front of my sister, and made to kneel at her feet, even though I'm over her. I was indignant about it and planned on putting up a huge fight if he told me to do anything for her.

"You should apologize to her. It's her fault she never gets laid because you're such a slut and take all her sex."
I giggled. I laughed in her face, in fact, even though I was being held on my knees at her feet by my hair. She laughed too, though.

My face was shoved to the floor and someone was spanking me. "Hit her harder, she's used to it." I have no clue who it was.

I feel like I was right in the front row, but somehow our fighting and struggling didn't bring anyone else into that I know of. I remember thinking that SargentMajor had pulled my pants aside to show everyone my ass (my pants had ripped and I didn't even know) as well. I had figured he'd strip me at the beginning of the scene, but I am glad that he didn't. He flipped me over and I don't remember seeing anything again here. People were hitting my stomach, and my sports bra was pulled up over my chest so that it pushed my boobs out and down. Now he was trying to make me piss. It was slapping, not punching or hitting with fists in any way, and I tightened my stomach and took it. I think I struggled here, but I don't really remember, I think I was being dragged in front of these people by my hair as they hit me, and I know the last 3 or 5 hits were from SargentMajor because they were harder than any of the other ones.

He put a sign over my head. it was cardboard, I don't know what it said (everything was blurred without my glasses and I could only see the front row of people), but he said they even made a sign for me to show everyone what a slut I was. (If I'd found out it said pig slut I would have been fighting it more, it's one of those things that turns Major on that I think is absolutely blech.)

Women were messing with my tits. This had been pre-negotitated that it be ok if females messed with them, and I was absolutely fine with that (again, attention to the tits is *nice.* [um, that being said, this was a scene. **Never** touch my breasts without my permission, it is important to note that I was in a rare frame of mind for this scene and also gave these people permission through negotiation to pay with them]) In fact, I'd said "Especially Tigger" because I thought he meant to ask one person to do it, and wanted to be vague so that I wouldn't know who it was. He made sure Tigger got a chance to play with them, too. She said something, but I honestly can't remember what it was, because everything blurs together after such a long scene. It seems like I remember seeing a few faces and being called names by the crowd at this point. 

SargentMajor was trying to move me somewhere and then grabbed my hair to do it and the water was so deep that I slid easily across the floor by my hair. Yes, I remember giggling here, too. I was supposed to get up and walk but it was so much more fun to slide around, I've never done anything like it before!

"Don't deny it, you're a good little slut," 

and I said, "I've never denied that, there's nothing wrong with being a good slut." 

"Well tell them." 

"I just did!"

"Louder."

and before I had a chance to do anything else, I was drowning again.

And He was kneeling on my chest, and emptied the bucket over my face and held my head still, and I could feel a layer of water in the back of my throat after the water stopped, but I could breathe (shallow) and it felt like I couldn't but I was breathing! and I blew water out of my nose, and breathed again and again and blew a lot more water out of my nose. It was an amazing feeling to be breathing but feel like I had a layer of water in me at the same time. This time it was without the cloth over my face I think, but it kept finding it's way back over my face or into my mouth. When it was just in my mouth it shielded my mouth from the water and I could breathe around the edges of it. When it was over my face, I would gasp for breath as soon as the water stopped only to have a soaked cloth suction to my face because the fabric was so light it followed any light movement of air, and blocked my breathing. I had to gasp, then control myself long enough to blow air out and then breathe shallow so that I could get air at all. After two buckets in the face (he had someone refill it) when he was on top of me, he let me struggle free enough to roll onto my stomach, and I laid there to breathe for a bit. I think I was able to see and look up at people at this point. I burped here, and called the color blue because the last person to say a color has to make a sex noise, and I was afraid he'd hold my mouth shut, let everyone else say a color, and then say I owed that on top of saying whatever it was he'd told me to tell them. That I was a whore, or a slut or something like that. "Always playing games, aren't you, bitch?" And his hand went into my hair again. "Yeah, what else is there but to play games?"

Then he started using the hose. I fought like hell against that. A bucket is bad enough, but an unlimited supply of water? It scared the shit out of me (not in real life, but in the scene) and I held on to that hose (I put a crimp in it) for dear life. I think I eventually got water-boarded and drowned with the hose too, but I don't remember that specifically.

I don't remember what triggered SargentMajor putting the bucket on the floor tilted and pushing my head into it, it may just have been that he didn't want to spend the effort to flip me over and hold me down again. I can't remember what he was saying at this point, I think this was when he told me again to tell everyone what a whore I am. I wouldn't do it because the bucket was suddenly empty. And then he asked someone to refill it. The same person that later offered me a cookie. Half full bucket, head in, and then I think I fought pretty hard there. Gasping on the concrete, dripping and trying to breathe, I think I could see at this point, because I could see the inside of the bucket... 

"Here she can have a cookie" (random person here)

"Thats a great idea! Here slut, have a cookie"

He shoved this huge mother fucking chocolate chocolate chip cookie into my mouth, and not only just a little but as much as he could fit, and halfway down my throat it felt like. I had to eat one of those before the scene at Master's order, and I thought it was disgusting then, too. I gagged and coughed and choked and spit it out and swallowed what was left, and he loved that shit. He pushed my face into it and rubbed my face into the ground into the half-chewed soggy cookie crumbs, and in the background I hear random say, 

"What? I was trying to be nice!"

"It looks like you shit everywhere, you should be ashamed of yourself! Do you see this?" I think my face was rubbed in it again after that. 

and I'm laying there again, and the sign is pulled back behind me and I feel like I'm going to throw up, but I'll never say that because he had just said that if I were to throw up, it'd probably be all white, because all I ever do is eat cum. I was actually weighing the effort of trying to move the sign so it didn't choke me and how embarrassed I'd be if I actually threw up in front of a group of people. I was surprisingly more leaning toward throwing up, just to throw some people off, and maybe freak some people out. I wouldn't have felt embarrassed at all I don't think. I was too far enjoying it to even know that other people existed.

"Tell them. Tell them you're a fucking slut-whore and like to swallow cum."

"but..." (Yes, I actually didn't say it just because it sounded retarded. It sounded grammatically incorrect and I had a filter between my brain and mouth and it got my ass in trouble!) "But I am." (Yeah it sounded lame, but I didn't want to say the actual phrase) 

"Don't tell me, tell them. Say it loud enough that the back row can hear you."

"There's a back row?" (This was a shock to me, but my mind went immediately to "Fuck the back row!" and for me, the slut to say, "I did and it was great!" but no one else called the cue for me to say it, so I didn't)

"Hey, can you fill up the bucket again?"

"I can't.. I can't... I can't.." I was gasping for air here. 

"You can't what?"

"I don't know... please..."

The bucket was full of water again, and my head started to go into it. 

"What do I have to say?" 

"What?"

"What do.." Gasp. "I have to say to not go in the bucket?" I was stuttering, but not because I couldn't breathe. I was to the point that speech was pretty difficult. This scene was pretty awesome, and sometimes enjoying something gets in the way of coherent thought. 

"Ok we're done. Someone get me a towel, please." and my brain went blank.

"Wait.. I can do it... I can... I'm here. I'm here, why are you stopping?"

"It's over, you did great" The cuffs were being unlocked. I had to admit it was nice to have the cuff off my ankle, but I didn't understand why we'd stopped.  Major is awesome and caught when I started to lose myself before I did. I hate a scene ending so quickly, but I definitely enjoyed the aftercare. 

BTW I went upstairs and when Master came in to the bathroom I asked for permission to pee. I didn't have it before, so there was no way I could do it after I'd been told specifically not to pee without permission. While playing, the need to piss went away, but still it was really funny when I was about to pee and realized I had to wait. 

I had been in the shower with the water on for about a minute before He came in, and when He let me, I squatted in the shower and used the bathroom there (it was too much effort to get out and go to the toilet, I'd had trouble just turning the water to the right temperature).


A friend of mine said this the day after the scene:

I'm a terrible person that hardly ever responds to email. :( 

Dpolter commented:

That's ok, I'm (are we confessing things here?) a slut-whore and love swallowing cum! Ok, who else is confessing something?

(Which started a chain reaction)

I'm a horny bastard who thinks about naked women everyday doing evil things to them and then having them make me a sandwich...

I break into peoples house and cut the tags of their mattresses. So good to get that off my chest!

I have tapped on the glass at zoo exhibits...
. 

I never wear my seat belt... I'm going to hell. 

• comment
• 
  
  

  cancel

 Have a mental playlist of music for the scene - victim by Trapt, and Again by Flyleaf